Okay, so anyone who knows me has no doubt heard a crazy story or two about my crazy kids, their bright ideas, and trouble-causing ways. Well, check this - it was on a Friday, my ex-husband had come
by to pick-up our boys for their weekend with him. I didn't have
anything planned, so it was just gonna be a quiet weekend home alone. I
decided to pick-up the boys' room for them. I walked in and it was
actually relatively clean (shock 1). As I'm walking out I notice that
the lid to the snake's tank is partially open. I had asked my
8-year-old, Orion, to make sure the snake had water before he left so I
figured he just hadn't closed it right. I snapped it shut, and went to
the living room to check what was on TV.
As I'm flipping through the
channel guide, this awful thought pops into my head (you know!). So I
get-up, walk back into my boys room, and go to the snake's tank. Okay,
so I'm sure some of you are wondering why I did this - I should have
noticed if the snake was gone. Well, the snake is a sand boa and it is
usually burrowing under the sand. So I had to stick my hand in the tank,
sift through the sand, and physically check to see if Snakey-snake
(this is the snake's name) was in there. He's not (shock 2). Okay, so I
did a search and came up empty-handed (F$@&!). Sunday, I went into
work, and came home and waited for the boys' arrival. Their Dad dropped
them off promptly at 7:00 pm. When we were inside I let the boys know
that Snakey-snake was missing and that I'd looked, but hadn't been able
to find him. They were like, "Oh, we know, he's BEEN gone.." To which I
replied, "Why didn't you tell me?!" Please note that this is what I'm
saying, but I'm thinking (WTF!) and the responses were: "We thought
you'd get mad." and "Well, he's
already gone." I imagine that the logic to the last response is that
since he escaped, he is obviously a very cunning wild animal and so
being, we shouldn't waste our resources trying to find him... (???). So,
I had to break it down and explain that he will eventually die without
food and once he does "pass" he will begin to stink. At this point my
older son, Oly, says, very excitedly, "He'll be easy to find then!" lol!
Yes! We'll smell him out! *smirk*. He's so smart... and I'm very proud
of him. My little one (the owner of the snake) says, "Mom, the snake
won't die he can eat bugs." (*Surprise*) "What bugs?" Then my older son
says, "Orion has been collecting June Bugs under his bed." I look over
at Orion and he refuses to make eye contact, but this is a different
issue.
"Okay, well the snake got out
because someone left the lid to the cage open... Who?" ... "Not me." -
"Not me." (Side note: No one EVER does it... I don't know why I ask).
Then I ask, "Well, I bought mice for him last week... What happened to
the mice?" They don't know (no one ever KNOWS anything either). So I decide to
stop asking questions that I'm not going to get answers to and decide
that it would be better if we all searched again.
This story is already long, so let
me tell you it's conclusion: I found the snake. It was under Orion's
mattress. It hadn't been squished because Orion, besides having June
bugs under the bed, also had books, transformers, and power rangers
under his mattress (it's easier than putting them away... you should try
it), the void that these items left created a "triangle of life" for
the snake... lol
I'll let you guys in on all the hilarious haps at the house as it goes down... Love you all! Take care!
P.S. Orion had the audacity to ask me if he could have a pet rat yesterday. I told him to ask his Dad!
